Tag: business

Good Riddance 2016

2016 – Definitely Not an Odyssey

Well, 2 days into the new year and it feels largely the same as 2016!

I think a lot of people make the mistake of thinking that by some kind of divine intervention, the coming of a new calendar year is somehow going change them (new year, new me). Or that it may  bring them some kind of different life. As though there is some kind of divine being in control of their fate, a ‘Sky Wizard‘ if you will!

I’m not about to start waxing lyrically about how I’m a pessimist, or a realist (of which I am neither) or any other kind of ‘ist’ really. If I was forced to choose one like my very existence relied upon it, I would be somewhere between optimist and opportunist.

For me, I strongly believe that we are in full control of our own destiny. We are our own Sky Wizard, and as such, it’s up to us to get about fixing the things we don’t like. And let me tell you, there was a lot about 2016 that was not to like. I’m sure everyone has their own list of reasons that 2016 could fuck right of and your probably damn well happy that it has!

However, on the other hand, there was a lot about 2016 that was to like, a lot!

2016 was a year of change for us in the Edge household. The first half was pretty mundane. Work was pretty straightforward, Mel was plowing through her pregnancy (and bags of chips) with flying colours. Lucas was getting in trouble looking under the toilet doors as school (to see people wee), and we were fostering rescued Greyhounds. By all accounts, most likely an average 6 months in an average Australian family of 3.

The second half of the year was where things got interesting.

Without a shadow of a doubt, the highlight of my (our?) year was finally getting to meet Flynn. You can read the story of his Birth here. He is an incredibly sweet, calm and easy going little boy. He has brought a sense of calm to us both that we didn’t know before, both Mel and I love him dearly. As we do both of our sons.

Mel had made the decision to take a full 12 months maternity leave after Flynn was born. A decision that had (and still has) my full support. When Lucas was 6 months old, Mel made the tough decision of returning to work. Even though things have worked out fine, has always felt that this was the wrong thing to do.

And you know what, even though money is tight, we shop at Aldi, and no longer eat meat, things have been great! Both boys are thriving, Mel is a lot more relaxed (most days) and she has an incredible bond with the boys that is completely different to mine.

I reckon anyone that claims to be a perfect father is fooling themselves, but not fooling anyone else. Parenting is hard work! It’s the hardest bloody thing I’ve ever done. And it’s a heck of a lot of responsibility. I’m sure I’m not the only one to feel this way? It’s our job, to care for, nurture and mold this person into the kind of adult that will be able to function in an ever changing society. That’s some heavy shit right there! I’m flat out most days just getting myself to do the things that I need to to get through my day. Brush my teeth, shower before work, no sugar in my 4th cup of coffee for the day. And that’s before 8am.

For my brother and I, we grew up in a pretty typical household. Dad worked (a lot), Mum did the household stuff, and we went to school. Both my parents are fantastic. They sacrificed everything to bring us from the UK to Australia in 1989, so I’m not about to get on my soapbox about how my childhood was hard, and that it’s not my fault that I am the way I am. But it is you see. Yes, Dad was quite authoritative and at times dictatorial, but we were kids. Pushing the boundaries, testing the limits and creating chaos wherever we went.

Do I want to be that kind of parent to my boys? No. Am I? Sometimes, yes. And it’s not until it’s too late, that I realise that I am slipping back into learned habits.

I’m sure by now you’re thinking ‘Why the bloody hell is he banging on about his daddy and 1989 when this is supposed to be about 2016?”. Well, I do have a point, and I’m getting to that (Shush Mel, my stories are important, however meandering.)

Back in October, we had Lucas assessed by a pediatrician. A pediatrician that charged us $400 to have us and his teacher do all the work for her. (I’m definitely in the wrong line of work.) Long story short, she came to the conclusion that Lucas has symptoms that suggest he has ADHD. I say suggest because I’m still not convinced, or i could just be reluctant to label the boy. Nonetheless, he does behave different to other boys his age and has issues recognising boundaries and when Mum and Dad are feeling the pressure of a constant barrage of begging for the tiniest morsel of our own dinner. Coincidentally exactly the same as his.

He can be an incredibly sweet boy, and has an amazing zest for life that i think all adults forget. Life has a nasty habit of making us get way too serious about things, and we can sometimes forget to have a sense of humor.

And here it is, the point of the last few paragraphs is that coming out of 2016 and in to 2017, we’ve had a lot of changes in our household. Quite significant ones at that. Most notable is the obvious additional mouth to feed (good on you love, you’re boobs are doing a great job!), we’ve had a significant drop in income while an increase in expenses and lastly. We’re having to completely redesign the way we parent. And it is unquestionably more of a lesson for Mel and I than it is for Lucas.

So here I am, jumping on the bandwagon that is full of people that proudly chime “Fuck off 2016!”, as we launch into what I’m going to call “Fuck yes, 2017!”

That’s all for now. I’d love to hear what you have said goodbye to in 2016! I’m sure you’ve got your own stories to tell.

If I’m not back in 5 minutes. Just wait longer!

A Husbands’ Quandary

Life is a funny old thing. One one had, we can stroll through life, accepting our lot and being one of the masses. On the other, we have an option to chose to do something completely different and alter the course of destiny. Despite what you may think, there is only one person that has anything to do with it and only one person can change this. And that is, once again, the person looking back at us when we look in the bathroom mirror. Life is one big challenge.

I once heard a story about a bucket of crabs, and how if you have a bucket of crabs, you never need a lid as if one of the crabs tries to get out, the others will reach up and drag them back down into the bucket. People are a bit like that. They get uncomfortable with another persons aspirations of success (climbing out of the bucket) that they somehow manage to talk them out of it. Saying trivial things like ‘that kind of life isn’t for folks like us, mate’.

So what do we do about it? If you’re anything like me, not much. And sometimes, I have no idea why. There are a lot of things that I want to achieve in my life, and Mel and I have the vehicle to achieve this. Some days (who am I kidding, it’s most days) I come home from work, get changed, cook and eat dinner, then YouTube or Netflix happens. The arse gets parked and that’s me done for the night. Hardly moving a muscle until it’s bed time. Living a life of SSDD (same shit, different day). I make myself feel better by watching motivational videos on YouTube (Gary V, anyone?), reading, or listening to motivational audio tracks, but nothing compares to actual proper old fashioned work. And I don’t mean employment or self employment either

As I sit here, Netflix playing in the background, I feel as though I am at a crossroads. And it’s a fairly significant one too. A great deal of my reluctance has a whole lot to do with fear. And as strange as it sounds, it’s the fear of success that is rearing its ugly head and knotting up my stomach. Odd, I know, but it’s quite common. My own thougths of ‘who am I to think I deserve a life like that?” I can quit my whinging, suck up life and accept the status quo, OR, I can knuckle down, get my hind quarters out there and build a brighter tomorrow for our kids. Present and future.

So I challenge myself. And the challenge is to meet 100 new people before the end of the month. That’s 4.6 people per day, and I have no idea how I’m going to achieve it. That’s what being an entrepreneur is all about though. Identifying a problem and coming up with a solution to said problem. Perhaps I’m not a fully fledged entrepreneur yet, but I’m closer than what I was yesterday.

I challenge you, if you feel like your living a life of re-runs, SSDD is getting you down, or you are just absolutely, mind bendingly fed up with your lot in life. Get up, make a commitment to do something different. Step outside of your comfort zone and make a bigger, better life, you deserve it!

If you do decide to do something different, let someone know. Make a commitment and write it down. You never understand the power of a statement until you see it written down in your own hand. Let me know about it too, I’d love to hear from you and what you want to achieve.

 

Stay tuned as well, as my story is set for big changes. And it begins and ends with me.